Alice’s Restaurant

November 21, 2006

T-Day Minus Two

Filed under: Suzy Homemaker — aliceaudrey @ 9:40 pm

You know how Foxworthy likes to do those “You might be a redneck if…” jokes?  I’ve got “You might procrastinate too much if…” jokes.

You might procrastinate too much if …

…the tools you need to get ready for a party include a pumber’s wrench, a screw driver, a hammer, or a paintbrush.

… your child’s teacher phones  – yes PHONES – to find out where the reports for the last four chapters went, and you only got your hands on the book yesterday.

…. your family is so used to the things stuffed into the closet falling on their heads that they coined the phrase “booby trapping” to describe your cleaning habits.

…  you have been spotted chasing the FedEx truck.  More than once.

… you never change the VCR clock to Daylight Savings Time because it’s only going to go back to Standard Time in a little while anyway.

… it’s easier to buy a new computer than to clear off all the old files.

…  the turkey is still frozen when you put it in the oven.  Dressing?  What dressing?

On the task list for today –  Clean the house.  Maybe paint the upstairs hall.  Fix the leaky faucet.  Remind the kids they are supposed to help cook, not make messes in the living room.   Eat all leftovers to make room in the refrigerator.  Poke the turkey.  Still frozen?  Better get out the cooler.



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